ugh. i am so tired. just completely out of it. i just want to shoot my brains out right now. but i'll settle for lying in bed like a lonely, sad, pathetic girl. [i'm a bit melodramatic. deal with it.] i'm even too tired to eat even though i'm starving right now. don't have the energy to make food. that's how tired i am. not too tired to blog though. isn't that sad? oh well, going to crash now. bye.

oh, i forgot to blog about something earlier. you know what was funny today? i was wearing my orange/pink tube top today (with khaki capris - yes, the weather was nice enough for me to break out the slut clothes. haha to all you norcal people with rain. ;) and so the tattoo below my neck was visible. i was walking out of vietnamese class today when ailinh comes up behind me and says, "so...was someone bored in class today?" and i was like, "huh?" at first, i was thinking, maybe she thought i was looking sleepy in class today but then i wasn't dozing off or anything. and then she kinda nods to my tattoo and said, "was someone bored in class?" again. i was really confused. i got that she was referring to my tattoo, but i didn't understand what that had to do with being bored in class. finally, it dawns on her, and she was like, "oh wait a sec. is that a tattoo?!" apparently, she thought that someone sitting behind me in one of my classes got bored and drew a crescent moon and falling stars on my back.

hey, so linguistics lecture was really interesting today. we had a guest speaker - one of the authors of a book we had to read, deaf in america. i was actually really looking forward to the lecture today. i even got to class early. okay, so i'm a nerd. anyway, the author, carol padden, is Deaf. so it was really interesting watching her lecture. she had an interpreter (a really good interpreter) but it was just really cool watching her sign. it made me want to take an asl class again. i took asl in 7th grade, but i've pretty much forgotten everything except for the alphabet. her lecture was really interesting too (repetition of "really interesting." must buy thesaurus. anyone recognize that line? it's from sliding doors. ;) um, anyway..).

fremont people - you guys know how we have the california school for the deaf in fremont? like, we're always passing it and we never really know much about it. yeah, well, today she mentioned it in lecture. she told us that it used to be in berkeley but then uc berkeley bought the land so it moved to san jose and then eventually moved to fremont. now it serves the entire bay area. i don't know why, but i always thought it just served fremont. so fremont's actually got something pretty important in it. i always thought it was just some small, weird town that no one ever went to except to get their kids into "good" schools. overall, her lecture was pretty cool. i didn't fall asleep at all! ;) she talked about the telephone, tty's, captionings, her family life (which i thought was the most interesting part), and she answered a few questions too. one guy asked her if she thinks in english or in sign and she said that when she writes, she thinks in english, and when she signs, she thinks in sign, which makes total sense cuz if you're fluent in two languages, you usually think in whatever language you're speaking. but then it's weird to think that people think in sign, isn't it? i guess their thoughts are just more "visual" as opposed to "wordy." i don't know.

you know, it's classes like these that make me really enjoy learning. i don't think i've enjoyed learning enough. i mean, we complain about it so much. actually, we just mostly complain about the work. i know, i know, i do it too. everyone does. work just sucks [hairy monkey balls. big ones]. i hope once i start taking my psych classes, i'll start liking school more. oh i know, it's so gross to like school, but what can i say, i'm a geek. and a dork. i am SUCH a dork. i can't believe it. i'm embarrassed of myself some times. i say and do so many dorky things. ah well. i don't like ALL of school. just the cool classes. like linguistics. and psych. :)

hey, i feel kinda bad. i just emailed my mom like, practically all of my vietnamese homework cuz i couldn't figure out a lot of it. and i know she goes to bed early so instead of just sitting there and trying to figure it out and THEN asking for her help, i just sent her the entire thing so she could fill it out for me before she went to bed. ;) this is bad, i know. didn't do too well on my last vietnamese test either. :-/ i mean, it was better than what i expected so i shouldn't feel too bad, but still. it's not good. dammit. i knew i should've switched the class to pass/no pass, especially since i'm only taking this class for "fun." my gpa is going to be awful this quarter. thank GOD i was allowed to take physics pass/no pass, otherwise i'd be in a whole shitload of trouble. anyway. going to make pancakes now. god, i've been eating so much. but my mouth still wants to eat.

OH WELL. WHO CARES. FOOD IS GOOD, RIGHT? RIGHT.

oh. my. god. soooo sore....can't. move. uuuuggghhh.... butt is especially sore. but that's a good thing. it means i was doing the squats correctly this time. but uuuugghhh...soooore... okay, time to shower.

ahahahahahaaa...guess what me and sanaz just did. so we were all just hanging out in the kitchen (me, tasha, sanaz, and neha) and tasha's phone was sitting on the counter so i picked up the headset and put it on and i was saying stupid things like, "delta delta delta, how may i help ya help ya help ya?" and "call 1-800-dentist today." and then i was like, "hey, you should be like a telemarketer [for halloween]!" and then...well, actually, i have no idea how i got this idea, but i thought it would be funny to dress up as one of the guys. and then...well, i have no idea how i got this idea either, but i thought it would be funny if i dressed up as li'l mike and sanaz dressed up as ben. it was the most hilarious fifteen minutes. me and sanaz broke out our blush and started applying like LAYERS of blush all over my face. [let me explain: li'l mike has a fairly, well, fair complexion so when he blushes, he turns BRIGHT red. it's so funny - not for him though, i'm sure. but i have never seen anyone turn so red before.] but the blush that sanaz was putting on me was like this brownish color so the left side of my face just looked super tan while the blush i had was just really pink so the right side of my face just looked super pale. it was hilarious, man...so then me and sanaz went out into the kitchen to ask neha and natasha if they had any brighter, redder blush. so they broke out their blush and their colors were PERFECT. so now neha was like caking my face with blush. i swear, i must've had *at least* five layers of blush on my face or something.

anyway, after the whole blush incident, i made a sign that said "li'l mike" and taped it on my chest while sanaz made a sign that said "ben" and taped it on her chest. then she grabbed a lamp shade and put it on her head. [yeah, this needs explaining too. a while ago, ben was over studying and him and sanaz were just procrastinating or something and so he put a lamp shade on his head and pretended it was like, one of those vietnamese hats - the kind they wear in rice paddies, you know? psst...i've got a picture of him posing with that hat on too. ;)] and then she gave me a red, cinnamon candle. [explanation: some time last year, i don't remember when, li'l mike bit into a cinnamon candle because it smelled good. and you thought i was weird.] so then we posed for pictures with sanaz in the exact same pose ben had in my picture and me pretending to take a huge bite out of the candle. it took a while because me and sanaz were like hysterical laughing. when one would stop, the other would start. but eventually we managed to take the pictures then we headed over to the guys' apartment next door with a shopping bag in hand (for trick or treating!). it was funny cuz me and sanaz were both in our pajamas cuz we were too lazy to change clothes. so anyway, we rang the doorbell and matt opened the door and at first he just looked at us like, "what the...." and then he read our signs and realized and started laughing. jon came over next and laughed. we had to call out ben and mike's names because they weren't in the living room. ben came out first and then mike. i don't know. they had a funny reaction. they didn't exactly burst out laughing, but they weren't like...well, it was just weird. i don't know. so we just stood around outside talking for a little bit. ben was like, "i don't always wear that lampshade" and i was like, "well, yeah, mike doesn't always go around eating a candle" to which he said, "good point." eventually, we took a group picture - me, mike, sanaz, and ben. then we headed over to the girls' apartment to show them our costumes. their reactions were much better. :) grace answered the door and she looked at us and i think it took a little while to realize what we were dressed up as and she was just like, "ohhhhmygoodness...." we came into their apartment so melissa could see since she was sitting on the couch watching tv. she started laughing at us. but that's expected of melissa; she laughs at everything. helen saw us too and was just like, "you guys are weird."

so anyway, after that, me and sanaz headed back to the apartment. had a little trouble getting in cuz tasha was the only ones with the keys and her and neha had gone to their friend's place so we had to wait a little, but we got back in eventually. i dashed into the bathroom and started scrubbing my face like crazy. my washcloth is like all reddish/brownish. so i guess the funniest part of the night was just me and sanaz getting into our "costumes" - especially putting my makeup on. ahhhh....man, i can't wait for these pictures to be developed. ;)

ugh. did not do well on linguistics midterm. piece of shit. stupid overachieving freshmen. curve didn't help out too much.

italian partner did not show up for class today so now presentation is going to be on friday. stayed up till 3 am working on presentation and woke up late. alarm went off at 730 but i didn't hear it till 8. that like, never happens. i ALWAYS hear my alarm within like the first ten seconds. a lot of the time, actually, i wake up two minutes before my alarm goes off. i have a pretty good internal clock. but i guess i was so tired last night/this morning that it didn't work. anyway, nate (my italian partner) called and left a message apologizing because he overslept too. ah well, it's okay. at least it's finished.

earthquake last night was a 5.1. epicenter was somewhere in palm desert or something like that. you know, i just realized, every earthquake i've ever experienced (including the loma prieta one) has occured when i was inside a house (or in last night's case, an apartment). i've never experienced an earthquake outside. not that weird, but whatever.

okay, time for lunch then kickboxing at 3.

uhhh...just had an earthquake. crap. i was just like looking up a word in my italian dictionary and then i noticed the tissue in the tissue box start to wave just *slightly* but it wouldn't stop. i half thought, "maybe it's the guys downstairs." and half thought, "it's an earthquake." and the slight shaking went on for about ten seconds, and then the shaking became a lot stronger and then it was very obvious we were having an earthquake. the picture frames on my monitor started moving and everything. but the strong shaking was over pretty quick. well actually, you know when there's an earthquake, even if it's a really short one, while it's happening, it just feels like it'll never end? yeah, that's what it felt like. after the shaking stopped, i was like, "uhh...sanaaaaaaz....?" and sanaz and ben came out of her room and asked me if i was all right. they felt it too. obviously, though, because the shaking was strong enough to move small objects. it's so weird though because i didn't think there would be any earthquakes in san diego, especially la jolla because it's so close to the coast. ergh...okay. my heartrate's slowed back down to normal. i'm okay. back to italian.

just a random thought (aren't they all?)... did you know that cherry in vietnamese is simply "cherry" and that cherry in italian is "ciliegia"? well, now you do.

guess what...i made brownies again tonight. :) yes yes, i know this is bad. made two batches of brownies within a week - and they weren't even for a party or anything! just for me. and my roommates. and whoever else happens to come up to our apartment. ;) i love making brownies. i love eating them too. they give me a sense of accomplishment. maybe i should be a pastry chef! yeah, i'll call it the cherry pit. ;) seriously, that was the name of our make believe 50's diner for our decades report. we had to research a decade of time in the 1900's for junior year and present it in an interesting way. so me and my friends (shirl, di, jen, chris) decided to have a 50's diner (our decade was actually '45-'55) and we named it "the cherry pit" (my idea, of course. egotistical? what are you talking about?) and i was the waitress. the dancing waitress. yes, let's not get into that. that was kind of embarrassing. but embarrassment just seems to be my middle name.

wow, how'd i get to talking about our decades report? oh, that's right. the brownies. mmm....see, didn't i tell you guys that all i'd be making is brownies this year? but hey, my roommates seem to really like it, so why stop? :) we're all going to be fat by the end of the year. but that's okay because natasha needs fat. i'm going to fatten my roommate up by the end of this year if it's the last thing i do!!!

anyway, back to working on my italian presentation. gonna be talking about the italian mafia. ;) my idea. [we're working in partners]. i AM a genius, you know. with big boobs. yes. big boobs and big brains. (well okay, so just one brain, but it's still big - metaphorically speaking). oh, and long legs. yes. long legs, big boobs, and big brains.

"shut up, cherry!"
"okay, sanaz..."

i love mayonnaise. i really love mayonnaise. i mean, i wouldn't ever eat it straight from the jar, eew. but i think the mayonnaise is my favorite part of the sandwich. and i love the word mayonnaise. it's funny how people pronounce it differently. some people call it "may-oh-naze" and some people call it "may-naze" (omitting the "oh"). i just love mayonnaise.

okay...so here's cherry's embarrassing moment of the day:

i was in italian class and i really have no idea what the instructor was talking about. nor did i care. i slept like less than four hours. not really that little, but still. i was tired. sleepy tired. VERY sleepy tired. so i started nodding off in italian. not a good thing because there's only about fifteen people in that class so it's not too easy to hide when you're sleeping. and this wasn't the first time either. like a week ago or something, i started to nod off and then my instructor asked me if i was sleepy in italian. naturally, i opened my eyes and said yes. but that wasn't too embarrassing. i was just like, yeah, i'm tired. slept three hours. studying for midterms. blah blah blah. but this time was a bit more embarrassing. instead of just asking me if i was sleepy (in a normal tone of voice), she decided to yell, "SVEGLIATE!!!!" at me. i was miserably jolted awake from a pleasant almost-dream about a flying trapeze. then she told me to read a passage from our italian book which i read with perfect pronunciation to prove that i wasn't sleepy even though i had just woken up from my almost-nap. kind of embarrassing, although i don't think anyone noticed me dozing off except for the instructor because everyone else was looking at their books. but i'm pretty sure they DID notice when the instructor yelled "SVEGLIATE!!!!!" at me. ("svegliate," if you haven't already figured it out, means "wake up") ah well...to tell you the truth, i wasn't too embarrassed. just a little. at least i didn't fall out of my seat or something. that would've been bad.

hey, www.kabalarians.com also had my real name. yes, that's right folks - cherry is not my real name. there's a whole story behind how i got the name cherry (no, my parents didn't give it to me either) but...wait...did i already blog about it? i have this feeling that i did...hm. anyway, who cares. i'll just tell it anyway, even though like, pretty much everyone in my life has heard this story before. screw linguistics midterm. so, once upon a time, when i was just a teeny tiny baby, my parents sent me to this american babysitter lady. she was unable to pronounce my real name so she decided to give me a nickname. apparently, she thought i had a very strong resemblance to a piece of fruit. gee, can you guess which one? (wow...it's a really good thing i didn't look like a watermelon or apple or something. could you imagine?? "hi, my name is watermelon. watermelon vu.") my parents said it was because all the other babies were american babies and just really fat which naturally made me look very little and apparently cherry-like. so from then on, i was called cherry and it just stuck. the end.

anyway, back to my real name. here's what www.kabalarians.com had to say about it...

THUY-DUONG
Your name of Thuy-duong has given you a generous nature. You will do your utmost to help others in need, despite inconvenience or even hardship to yourself. You are affectionate, and respond quickly to appreciation. As a child you were expressive. An imaginative, impressionable person, you could excel in the theatre as a dramatist or comedienne, and the enjoyment and appreciation of your audience would be your greatest inspiration. Fine as your nature is at times the power of your feelings is difficult to control as it unleashes itself through outbursts of temper. The name does not engender emotional stability; nor have you the system and order in your thinking always to finish what you start. Scattering of efforts interferes with success in your undertakings. Sensitivity in your nervous system could cause you to suffer either through goitre, or nervous conditions, or to experience hysteria or mental repression.

hysteria?? HYSTERIA?!? i'm never hysterical. "...you could excel in the theatre as a dramatist or comedienne..." hahahahaha. right. yeah, this description's a bit more inaccurate than the "cherry" one, but then i guess that's because no one ever calls me Thuy Duong. my vietnamese teacher calls me that sometimes, but she stopped after a couple of weeks. even my parent's don't call me Thuy Duong; they call me Cherry. or sometimes, "Girl." i'm serious. they call me "Girl" quite a bit; i guess they use it as a term of endearment or something as in, "study hard, okay girl?" or "eat healthy, okay girl?"

aaaaanyway...back to the books i go...

from www.kabalarians.com...

CHERRY
The name Cherry gives you a strongly independent and highly creative nature, with drive and ambition to have experiences and accomplish things out of the ordinary. You can work intently at whatever is new and holds your interest at the moment, but your interest wanes quickly when drudgery and monotony set in. Obstacles to your progress or restrictions on your freedom to act create a sense of frustration which may cause you to feel resentful and even rebellious. You can then become intolerant of others, and caustic and belittling in your expression, thereby imposing stress on your personal relationships. Although you have a clever, quick, capable mind, your progress in life is restricted by instability in your affairs and misunderstandings with people. Your impulsive nature can lead to actions which you later regret taking, or to accidents. Relaxation is elusive, and depletion due to nervous tension can develop to the point where you become subject to moods of depression and morbid thoughts. Nervous tension centres in the solar plexus, with nervous indigestion and stomach ulcers a possible result.

hey..i kind of agree...especially with the moods of depression and morbid thoughts (hahaha...i don't know why, but i find that sorta funny). same with the nervous indigestion and stomach ulcers (although i've never really had a stomach ulcer...just really REALLY bad stomach aches where i just want to blow my brains out).

okay. REALLY need to study for linguistics midterm. like, seriously. really. right. okay. here i go.

can't. concentrate. having trouble focusing. uuuugghh...feeling really lazy right now (well, okay, so i was like this all weekend; it's nothing new).

i have a midterm tomorrow, dammit!! must study. right.

*stares at television*

oops. before i forget...HAPPY BIRTHDAY JO! eat cake. ;)

MY INTERNET IS WORKING AGAIN!!!!! HALLE-FUCKING-LUJAH!!!! *does the dance of joy* (perfect strangers, anyone?)

posting last night's blog...

saturday, october 27, 2001, 1015 pm:

oh, i am SUCH a bum. i swear, the weekends bring out the bum in me. i am having a total singleton weekend. did like, absolutely nothing last night. ate brownies and watched old figure skating tapes till like 3 am. went to bed in an empty apartment, woke up in an empty apartment. i didn't think i would be freaked out, and i wasn't. not a lot, anyway. just a teeny tiny bit, but it was okay.

woke up around 11 am. switched on the tv and just lay in bed for about twenty minutes. then got up, brushed my teeth, got dressed, blah blah blah. thought about calling my italian partner, but i didn't really want to. i mean, i gave him my number too. he should call me! why should i always call? besides, he was the one with work too, so i didn't know when he'd get out. he should've called me when he got off work. but whatever. maybe i'll call him tonight or tomorrow or something. my internet is STILL not working. don't know if this will post, so i'm just typing this out on wordpad first. at least i can get on aim and receive email. but i can't get any webpages and it's really REALLY annoying.

i should really start studying for my linguistics midterm on monday, but i'm feeling so lazy. i mean, the midterm is all multiple choice AND there's a curve! probably start studying late tomorrow night. not good, i know. can't help it.

anyway, back to my singleton weekend. very exciting. really. i watched tv pretty much all day. ate more brownies. made myself some potstickers. then had more brownies. then around 6, i decided to treat myself to bj's (a chicago bar and grill type restaurant close to campus. they have the BEST fettucine alfredo i've ever had and the awesome thing is, they deliver!). called them and ordered seasoned fries with a small cheese and tomato pizza with extra cheese. mmm...soooo gooood....couldn't finish it all though so i stuck the leftovers in the fridge (it was kinda funny, when i looked at the receipt, the lady who took my order entered my name as "cherrie zu"). after that, i did my laundry. and...well, that's about it. what can i say? the perpetual singleton had a total singleton weekend. i think i'm gonna have myself another popsicle. yum.

okay. just pulled out an orange-flavored popsicle and am eating it now. can only type with one hand though. am still home alone. tasha came home today around 4 or 5 pm, can't really remember. but she just changed clothes and went out again so i'm home alone yet again. mmm...just finished orange popsicle.

hmm...gonna try and post this now. *crosses fingers* okay, it's not working. will try again later.

argh. still not working. stupid internet. stupid ucsd. at least we get an extra hour. (daylight savings time)

sunday, october 28, 2001, 1:39 am:

oh god, my life is so sad. so so sad. and by sad, i don't mean sad sad, i mean pathetic sad.