days till spring break: 20.

so me and sanaz did something sort of psycho last night.

it started a while ago. there was this poster/ad in the guardian (the ucsd newspaper). on it was this scrawny (well, okay, i guess SOME may consider him "cute" but...he's really not), shirtless guy wearing -- get this -- red leather pants with this huge silver belt buckle. he's really quite unattractive. plus he's got like this weird black semi-permed sort of surferish hair. think heath in 10 things but like...uglier. you know, the funny thing is, the way i'm describing him makes him look so ugly, but i think the intention of the poster was that he was supposed to be some cute guy. the poster's even signed "love, ernesto." ERNESTO. like, of *all* the names, ernesto?! helen's friend lili (dunno how to spell her name) stayed over last night though and she was like, "i think he's supposed to be someone famous" so i guess he can't help his own name. anyway, the point of the ad was to promote safe sex. on the bottom, it reads, "of all the things you want him to whisper in your ear, 'oops, the rubber broke' isn't one of them." and then there's more stuff about safe sex blah blah blah.

so anyway, i was reading the guardian one day and saw this and thought it would be really funny if i put it up smack dab in the middle of sanaz's wall cuz it's so bare. so i came back home from class, and put up the poster while she was away. she came back and she thought it was pretty funny so she left it up there. sanaz told me this later, but after i did that, her and helen came up with this idea to like, collect as many of these posters as they could, since there were like PILES on the floor somewhere (people would just pick up the guardian and throw the poster away. can't say i blame them.), and like, wait till i was gone one day and just wallpaper sanaz's wall with these posters. unfortunately, i am a lame-ass pathetic loser and i never leave the apartment, so sanaz and helen could never do it. but last night...me and sanaz were REALLY bored so we decided to do it. her wall looks so scary. there are 21 ernestos covering the ENTIRE wall. it looks like we went completely insane. when we finished, we just looked at it, and i just burst out laughing. it's just so psycho. naturally, we took a few pictures of it with my camera, and then with my webcam. i want to post them up here. but i don't think i can. :(

you know, this is a lot like our cereal wall last year. now THAT was psycho. last year, when we were living in our suite, we used to take the empty cereal boxes of those small, individual boxes and cut them up and wallpaper the biggest wall in our suite with them. we never quite finished it. i think we had like two rows left though. but it looked pretty insane. people who had never come to the suite before would just come in and be like, "whoa...you guys sure have a lot of time on your hands."

anyway...i'm gonna go...find something else to do now. bye!

hey, guess what. it's march.

days till spring break: 22.
days i think i can hold out for till i lose my last shred of sanity and go homicidal and bust a cap in someone's ass: 3.279.

i think i know what my problem is. it's kind of a no-brainer. i'm just going through a really bad period. it's not the bleeding though; the bleeding's at a normal level (i would apologize for being graphic but most of the people who read my blog are girls anyway, so whatever. and if you're a guy that's reading this, hey guess what buddy, you're going to get married some day and your wife is going to tell you all of this so you may as well deal with it now). it's everything else that's intensified - the cramps, the headaches, the backaches, the stomachaches, the FATIGUE, and most definitely the moods. everything's just like ten times worse.

anyway...going to bed now. did i mention the fatigue?

i really hate foreign languages. why can't everyone just speak english? i mean, really. there's a reason why most americans don't know a language other than english - THERE'S NO NEED TO. EVERYONE IN THE WORLD ALREADY SPEAKS FREAKING ENGLISH ANYWAY. ALL THE OTHER LANGUAGES OUT THERE CAN JUST KISS MY ASS. FACE IT, NO ONE SPEAKS YOUR LANGUAGE, YOU MIGHT AS WELL LEARN ENGLISH YOU FREAKING BASTARDS.

my life is so full of irony. it's just sick. i hate foreign languages, yet here i am taking two language classes simultaneously. i hate vietnamese, yet here i am taking vietnamese. i'm a psych major yet i hate therapy and i hate people.

i'm going COMPLETELY psycho over here. like, just imagine a little five foot girl running around in small circles screaming and howling and snarling while ripping her hair off her head and twitching uncontrollably. that's kind of what's going on in my head right now. the chemicals in my head are just NOT in balance.

for some reason, i feel really cut off from the world. i have no idea why. i just have no life. it's just...class, class, class. yeah, i know everyone's in that mode too, it's just...i don't know. such a weird feeling.

sometimes, i feel like going homicidal.

ugh. i hate vietnamese. presentation did not go well. the teacher liked my story but she was like, "your pronunciation was really bad. it was like an american speaking vietnamese; 100% american. i want you to see me after class." and this was in front of the entire class too. so of course, the entire class does that, "oooooh..." thing when a teacher says "i want to see you after class." it was just not fun. i hate vietnamese. i have to meet with the teacher every thursday afternoon for the rest of the quarter. she wanted me to see her every thursday next quarter too but i told her i wasn't taking the class next quarter so HAH.

it's just depressing though. that i'm such a horrible vietnamese person. and that i embarrassed myself in front of everyone. the whole time, the two fobs were just sitting there giggling while i was talking. dude, the chinese guy in my class can speak better vietnamese than i can. how humiliating is that? ugh. why can't i speak the language? why does it have to be so hard for me to learn it?? i mean, i learned italian just fine. and i don't even know any italian people. one would think i'd be better at vietnamese since i AM vietnamese and i've heard it spoken around me before, but...guess this just goes to show you that i'm just an idiot moron loser.

ugh. UGH. i hate vietnamese so much. i was on the phone with my parents for THREE HOURS trying to get this damn presentation straight. and i'm STILL going to screw it up tomorrow, i just know it. it just pisses me off so much that like, everyone in class can just go up there and just talk without having to plan every single word of what they're going to say while i have to sit here for three hours and spell out every single word so i don't embarrass myself. and i feel absolutely TERRIBLE that i kept both my parents up super late tonight especially since they both have to wake up so early. uuuuugh...i'm such an awful daughter. especially since i'm not even going to be continuing with the class next quarter. man, i feel bad for my parents. what a horrible daughter they have. i hate this stupid class. i can't believe it's causing me this much grief. i hate this class so much and it's supposed to be my "fun" class. irony sucks.

really though, i just hate the fact that i cannot learn this stupid stupid language to save my life. i mean, don't you think it's sad that i know more italian than i do vietnamese? i know if i told my vietnamese teacher that, she'd burst out into hysterics and start blaming me for turning my back on my heritage and all that other crap. why is vietnamese giving me so many problems?!? to tell you the truth, i've definitely got some issues with that language. i think i just feel more pressure to learn that language because i *am* vietnamese. with italian, it's like...whatever, it's just a cool language to learn. also, i hate to bag on my vietnamese teacher, but i need to find someone who can actually TEACH me the language, not throw out random unconnecting chunks of the language and expect me to learn from that. when i'm rich (yes, WHEN, not if), i'm going to hire a private tutor to teach me vietnamese. i will learn this stupid language if it's the last thing i do. i'm just going to stop taking this class because it's pissing me off so much. the people in there just make me feel stupid and absolutely incompetent. like, how can you not know your own language? i don't know, i just don't so BITE ME.

this class is just not good for my health.

i hate the vietnamese language so much.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....my mother is HILARIOUS. she signs her emails "Love Mon & Dad." okay, her name is NOT mon or monica or whatever. she just had a bit of a typo....that she makes like EVERY SINGLE TIME.

but who am i, ms. butcher-of-the-vietnamese-language, to talk?

ahahahahaha...my parents are doing my vietnamese homework. ;D

okay, so i have this presentation i'm supposed to give in vietnamese tomorrow. i just have to go up in front of the class and talk for like five minutes about like, anything. the teacher just wants us to speak in vietnamese. so i decided to talk about how i got the name cherry. and so i wrote out everything i wanted to say in english first and then i called my parents just now to ask them how to translate, well, everything because i mean, hello?! i don't speak vietnamese!! what the heck am i gonna talk about with my EXTREMELY limited vocabulary?? so instead of racking up a huge phone bill, cuz i told them "um...this is going to take a while," they told me to email them whatever i wanted to say and they would translate it all for me and send it back to me and i would call my mom back and recite it to her so she could fix my pronunciation. ;D i love my parents. they're so cool. "okay, just send us all your homework dear; we'll do all of it for you." you know what i think would be really funny though? if my parents just made up like my entire presentation and just made me talk about something else without me knowing. they'd never do that, of course, but i think it would be hilarious if like, i went up in front of the class tomorrow thinking that i was talking about how i got the name cherry but instead ended up talking about some embarrassing childhood incident or something.

anyway, i already sent them my presentation in english. i kinda hesitated at first though cuz i wrote some sorta funny things about my parents in there. let's just hope they don't do some major editing. ;D

la la la la laaa....okay, now to wait for my parents to email me back my homework. :) i love them.

oh, and "narcissus." that's a good song. ;D

alanis morissette is a goddess. go download "so unsexy" and "21 things i want in a lover." go. now!!

uh...i'm going to need A LOT of help from my parents with vietnamese tonight.

stat prof finally posted up the midterm grades. i shouldn't have been obssessing about it. i did decent. a bit surprising that i got a higher score on my short answer than on my multiple choice, but whatever. i have to do REALLY well on the final now to keep my grade. but that shouldn't be too difficult since my stat final is my last one and i have a lot of time between that one and the one before. thank goodness i dropped psycholinguistics so i don't have to be worry about a final for that class.

speaking of classes, sanaz registered me on tuesday since i had class during my registration time. thanks sanaz! you're a swell gal. ;D so next quarter, i'm taking:

- italian 50 (well, technically, i'm wait-listed for that class, but the teacher said that we'll get in. oh yeah, i have the same italian teacher next quarter as this quarter which is cool cuz she's a good teacher)
- mae 5 (mechanical & aerospace engineering. doesn't that just sound so impressive?? well, it's not. it's just a computer programming course - a prereq for psych majors. luckily, sanaz has taken this class before so i have her genius mind to help me out. plus, she hooked me up with a book i can buy off some random stranger she met in ap&m who's taking the course this quarter. is she great or what?!)
- psych 103 (introduction to principles of behavior - one of the core psych classes)
- psych 104 (introduction to social psychology - another one of the core classes)

i was (and still am) kinda worried about taking two upper div psych classes at the same time, but then i thought about it and i was like, well, i'm gonna have to take multiple psych classes for the next few years anyway and if i can't handle it now, i'm going to be screwed for the next few years. the good news is that i looked up both profs and courses in cape (course and professor evaluation) and they both got really high ratings for instructor and for course. but there were some comments like, "too much reading" or "vague papers", etc. but...i guess that's to be expected. no such thing as the perfect course. =| that would be nice though, wouldn't it? i was gonna take bio 3, but uh...yeah, i don't think so. the description sounded more interesting than the other bio classes, but i think i should stick with bio 10 since it's specifically designed for non-science majors (aka dummies) like me. bio 10 *is* offered next quarter, surprisingly, but...i think i'll just take it some other time. it'll probably end up being like, one of those ge classes that seniors finish off their last quarter.

as for my schedule next quarter, it's not too bad. i start at 10 every monday, wednesday, and friday but i have a huge gap between that first class and my last class (i only have two classes on mondays and fridays) which starts at 230. on tuesdays and thursdays, i start at 930, but like mondays and fridays, i have a huge gap between that first class and my last class which starts at 220. wednesday is my busiest day since i scheduled all my discussions on that day. but it looks as if all those discussions are optional, so... yeah. ;D it's not a bad schedule. i'm just thankful i get to wake up later, even if it's only by an hour. hey, an hour is a lot in sleep-time!! i get out a little bit later everyday though which i'm kind of sad about since there'll be more beach-weather days in spring quarter. :( but...i'm getting ahead of myself. i should just concentrate on my studies. right.

all right, enough of this boring babble about my classes next quarter. i'm sure you guys could all care less what classes i'm taking. i'm surprised you haven't skipped off to read someone else's blog yet. la la la la laaaa....

oh, the fmla meeting last night was really really interesting. i really liked it. i felt really bad that i started dozing off for a little bit but i couldn't help it! i'm on my period and i get fatigued easily. cut me some slack! anyway, a representative from the feminist majority foundation came down from la to talk to us about the fmf (like, who they are, what they've done, etc) and about mifepristone (aka "ru-486", "the morning after pill", etc.) and emergency contraception. it was really really interesting! and, at the risk of sounding like a complete nerd (i go to revelle, what do you expect?), it really motivated me to learn more about mifepristone (they call it "miffy") and emergency contraception ("ec") and to spread the word. she told us exactly how miffy worked (it's actually safer than the already safe surgical abortion) and that yale and the university of georgia are the only universities in the country that offer mifepristone on campus. the university of georgia was an interesting one...i mean, you just don't expect that they'd offer the morning after pill in georgia which is like part of the whole bible belt thing (isn't it?). and did you know that with *certain* brands of birth control, a certain dose could work as ec? like, with some brands, five birth control pills will equal one dose of ec. and you know what's kinda stupid? while they do offer ec here on campus, they only offer it on the weekdays. now, think about it. when do people have sex? wednesday night? i don't think so. anyway, the representative (her name was michelle) talked to us for a couple of hours and like totally motivated us to try and push for mifepristone to be allowed on campus but it's gonna be such an uphill battle since we live in la jolla which is just so ultra-conservative. but i think it'd just be so amazing if we could have that huge of an effect on our campus. ooh! and i get a cool pink t-shirt that says, "THIS is what a feminist looks like"!!

i am SUCH a geek. i can't believe it. oh well. i REVELLE in my geekiness. get it? get it?!? (you know, actually, i KNOW there are some of you out there that won't get that *cough*melissa*cough*, so i'll just spell it out: i revel in my geekiness, but i'm from *revelle* so...yeah, get it?) ahahahahahahahaha... oh god, i'm such a geek. i need help. actually, i wasn't the one who thought of that. i saw it on sanaz's shirt first. SHE'S the geekiest! HAH!! *points and laughs*

la la la...all right, this blog is getting just unbelievably long, so i'm going to shut up now and try to work on my vietnamese.

ps...i love you sanaz. ;D

why hasn't my stat prof put up the midterm 2 grades yet?? why?! WHY?!?!?

ooh, look at this. it's cute. ;D

uh...yeah, okay. you know how i said i would go take a shower in my last blog? well, i just went back to bed and haven't gotten up till just now. man, aunt flo is really kicking me in the ass this time. i didn't stay in bed cuz i was lazy; i stayed in bed cuz i felt really weak and tired. uuugh....okay, now i'm REALLY going to go take a shower now. because i am just so gross.

ohmygod...i'm such a bum. i'm missing all of my classes today cuz i just got up like fifteen minutes ago. my first class started at 9. i was supposed to get up at 7 but i just turned off my alarm and went back to sleep. i just couldn't get up...i just couldn't do it. uuugh. it felt really good to sleep in though. REALLY good. but now i've just given myself like a three-day weekend since i only have a class at 9 and a class at 10. sure, i could still technically go to my 10 am one right now but i look and smell really gross. i need a shower.

man...i can't believe i overslept that much. oh well. thing is, i went to sleep relatively early, around 1 am, but i just couldn't fall asleep. i was having major problems just falling asleep. i kept tossing and turning and couldn't stop. so i didn't sleep very well at first. so...i deserved to sleep in. right. yeah....

oh well, whatever. time to shower now.

ooh...they gave me a lot of vicodin.

i'm breaking out.